being used

Category: Dating and Relationships

Post 1 by romeo (the strongest man for love) on Tuesday, 09-Jan-2007 15:58:00

i am not sure why. but a lot of the girls that i have wanted to go out with have used me. the first one i liked got so close to me i had even asked her out.but she terned me down whitch was fare enough. but then i asked her out again. she never sid anything. the following another guy asked her out and she said yes. then the guy kept on saying this girl had never liked me. the second girl. i asked her out she said yes i thought we should take it slow because i was not exactly over the last one. then 5 days later she dumps me.

using this information what would u call these types of people after treating you like this?

Post 2 by Heavy Metal Girl 85 (Zone BBS is my Life) on Tuesday, 09-Jan-2007 16:28:34

yes i've been in situations like this, where I've been with guys and they act like they really want to be with me, so I get all attached to them and think that this will work out , and then they start treating me badly and they tell me that its not working out, so they have to go. What hurts me the most is my last relationship the guy goes off to meet someone who is not even close to him. I didnt' live close to him either, but I made it work. and now he is still not in a local relationship and he was telling me how she did al this stuff for him, but I know that all the stuff that he was talking about I can do for him if he ever came to visit me which never happened. I hope some day the right person will come along, I just hope I wont' realize the right person when it's to late

Post 3 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Tuesday, 09-Jan-2007 17:27:22

I to have been in that situation, more than once. It realy hurts when you think someone likes you, only to find out that your just there play thing, until someone else comes along. I've had that done to me numbers of times, and always more or less the same excuse. The guys that did this to me, were all sighted, and they all said that I was an easy target, cause I'm blind. I haven't had much luck with guys that aren't sighted either. So yeah, I can relate to both posters before me.

Post 4 by JH_Radio (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Wednesday, 10-Jan-2007 0:24:23

Oh Watson, I think you just need a weekend away from ur place, and glad that I can provide that. Katie will be glad to see you as wel, and if nothing else we'll have listening ears. You will find the right person someday, but it'll take time. If I were you I'd avoid t the last guy and not make any planns to see him anymore.

Post 5 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Wednesday, 10-Jan-2007 7:43:50

Something unacceptable in polite company

Post 6 by romeo (the strongest man for love) on Wednesday, 10-Jan-2007 15:53:35

just an update!

i have hird that the last girl wants me back. what a lode of bull shit. this is because i having talking to this girl. all day to day. there was nothing said. even by email.

Post 7 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Wednesday, 10-Jan-2007 17:16:52

If you realy want to kno if she does, ask her. If you don't want to go down that road anymore, tell her that to. I had to make it clear to someone just reasontly, that I was only interested in building a friendship with him, after he used and cheated on me. On the other side, maybe she just said it, to get you to talk to her again, and has no intentions of wanting you back. For what it's worth, my advice to you is, don't fall back into that trap again, cause you may end up being used again, and nobody! deserves that. Nobody deserves to have their heart broken over and over by the same person, or by anyone for that matter.

Post 8 by Emerald-Hourglass (Account disabled) on Thursday, 11-Jan-2007 18:49:01

I'm sooo worried that the guy i've been seeing is going to do this. He maeans so much to me, and it's always been hard for me to trust ppl, how do u know when he's starting to use you? How do u tell that he really cares?

Post 9 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Thursday, 11-Jan-2007 18:58:01

Is my partner not as attentive of me than usual?
do I trust my partner enough not to brake my heart?
if you don't or don't like what you end up hereing from your answers, you kno that there's something wrong there. It's completely up to you what you do, but like I said before, no one deserves to be hurt by the same person over and over.

Post 10 by romeo (the strongest man for love) on Saturday, 13-Jan-2007 14:41:12

you never really untill you rre enter a relationship. so i would a second chance is in order.

Post 11 by maroon five (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Saturday, 13-Jan-2007 21:45:30

Second chance, Yes, but not a third, or fourth.

Post 12 by jmbauer (Technology's great until it stops working.) on Saturday, 13-Jan-2007 21:58:29

Using your information, I'd say:

*quote*. i had even asked her
out.but she terned me down whitch was fare enough. but then i asked her out again. ... I suppose the girl figured one turn-down was enough and simply chose to ignore your subsequent advances.

*quote*. the second girl. i asked her out she said yes i thought we should take it slow
because i was not exactly over the last one. ...
It's bad enough going into a new relationship fresh on the rebound. Telling your partner this is the kiss of death. I wasn't there, but if I was told that by a wood-be partner, they would be no longer.

Good luck with whatever happens.

Post 13 by Bryan (This site is so "educational") on Thursday, 18-Jan-2007 15:08:58

yes we all get used from time to time, we just need to look for some sines, like do they respond to emails, do there storys change, and do they go telling everybody about your business, this just a few sines so be ware and listen to your gut, most of the time it will be right

Post 14 by romeo (the strongest man for love) on Sunday, 21-Jan-2007 10:43:54

when i posted this bord message i was not sure what to do. but we are together. but what i have to be careful of is that. am i being used? or will this relationship go anywhere. i will have to waight and see.

Post 15 by SensuallyNaturallyLiving4Today (LivingLifeAndLovingItToo) on Wednesday, 07-Feb-2007 15:31:28

If you are feeling insecure, as if you might be being used, then talk it out. Put your partner on the spot. Don't do it angrily, meanly, by guilting them or by accusing them, just insist that they be honest with you. Make them answer the hard questions, the deep complicated ones, the important ones, the ones that just need to be asked, the ones that you often don't want to ask and that they often times don't want to answer. If you feel uncomfortable talking openly with them then you need to get over it and do so anyway, for you, for them, and for your relationship. If you can't get over the discomfiture and have the conversation then the communication and trust isn't there for a true relationship anyway. If you hear answers you didn't want to hear the ball is then in your court and you need to make a decission, and if your partner won't discuss it with you at all then you can assume that there are certainly some problems and that if you are already worrying about being used that your instincts are in that last case most likely right.